The Year of Festivals and Weddings!

It's that time of year when we start to reflect on how it all went. I am really reviewing my year...what I liked, what I didn't and how I want to make life even better next year. This year seemed to be particularly full of festivals and weddings. I went to SIXTEEN festivals this year, mostly of the flow arts and burlesque variety. I performed and/or taught at all of them but one. What a whirlwind! All over the country and one in France. Bags and I also got married TWICE! So yeah...2015 = festivals and weddings!

I also produced the most nights of shows in the most amount of productions I have produced in one year. Seven nights of shows in the span of three events. I made a dream of mine come true which was to produce in a real big theatre with a curtain, theatre lights, a big stage and lots of seats...The Midnight Carnival this past November was definitely an achievement. 

Another highlight was starting a Burlesque troupe! I started The Hoop Unit six years ago and we have dabbled in burlesque from the beginning, plus I have produced student and advanced student burlesque pieces under the name Vaudeville Vixens but this year we made it official and began the Vaudeville Vixen Showgirl troupe. We had lots of fun opportunities and created three new unique acts that we performed in many exciting places. Plus I got so close with these women and found a sisterhood that I cherish dearly. 

Here I go with a brief(ish) overview of my year and way to process it, in all of it's glory :)

Thailand with Bags' Fam

We started the year in Thailand! Rang in the New Year in Chaing Mai with almost all of Bags' extended family. They had a massive family reunion for the holidays and I got to be introduced to his aunts, uncles and cousins who live in Australia, England and Zimbabwe. They made me feel so welcomed and included. I truly felt completely accepted and like I gained a second awesome family! My favorite part was that for the white elephant gift exchange I was given a hand drawn/painted portrait of Bags and I by Bags' cousin Shane which was signed by every family member. Heart melt!

BellyFusions, Paris

After Thailand I headed to Paris to participate in my second Belly Fusions Festival. It was an incredible opportunity to push myself to create a new Belly Hoop Fusion routine AND I got to teach two workshops - one in Belly Hoop and the other in Belly Burlesque. So much fun! I really love the whole team that make that festival happen, they are so organized and warm. I was lucky enough to stay in a wonderful fellow hooper's flat and have a dinner date with Lila Chupra Hoops, an inspiring Parisian Hoop Burlesque sister.  

Face of Temptress!

In February I experienced the Mac gig sizeism debacle that you can read about here. I also was crowned the Face of Temptress Fashion that month! One of my goals of the year was to do as many photo shoots as possible and work on pin-up modeling. If I didn't do a million other things, I would love to pursue a career as a pin-up model. Since I can't do ALL THE THINGS, just doing photo shoots and being apart of the pin-up model family at Temptress has been amazing this past year. I have learned so much! Janet is such an inspiration to me; she is a strong, successful businesswoman who gives other women confidence and makes them feel sexy in her amazing clothing. I couldn't be more grateful for my time working with her this year. We got to do shoots in her store, out and and about in OB, at the Lafayette, as a mermaid on the cliffs and in the OB Christmas parade, plus on a horse ranch to make an epic calendar. Thank you Janet for all that you do!

First Wedding!

Springtime brought abundance, and man was it a busy, satisfying time of year. I was able to be featured in Lola Demure's House of Blues Burlesque & Variety show as well as Ooh La La's Circus Burlesque show at Tango Del Rey. I produced the VaVa VOOM! show with headliners Kristina Nekyia and Erin Shredder. It was the first show I produced that had solos from students who had taken my Solo Act Creation course, which I am running again this January. Both Kristina and Erin taught workshops while in San Diego that weekend. After that, Bags and I GOT MARRIED! The first time :) Bags' mom came from the UK and my mom and brother were there too. It was a spontaneous and beautiful wedding at the courthouse in downtown SD. I wore Temptress Fashion and we brought our Hoopologie hoops (of course).

The Flow Show, SF

We then headed up to SF to perform in the flow show. We debuted our multi-hoop juggling duet, "Circling the Infinite". We had worked on it hard for months and got the opportunity to perform it three times that weekend. We also were able to bring it around to every flow festival we taught at this past year. It was so satisfying to do the same act so often, and really hone it in. Each festival presented it's own challenges with performing the act, which I believe we learned from every time. In SF I was also able to perform with Hubba Hubba Revue and we taught workshops up there as well, hosted by the lovely Cherry Hoops. I was interviewed by Paige of HulaHoopla, you can listen the interview podcast here. We visited Harbin Hot Springs before it burned down. I feel so lucky to have been able to visit that magical place and to have taken Bags there before the destruction hit later this year. It was the most relaxed I had ever felt...yoga in the morning, alternating submerging in hot and cool pools, gazing upon a wild doe, sunbathing in the nude and getting a massage...ahhhhh, absolute bliss!

Fire Ceiling at Flame Festival

Our first flow festival of the season was FlowStorm in Texas. It was held at Quilombo Paixao which is Wesley's family's home on acres and acres of farmland. It was a small, intimate gathering that mixed lots of interesting workshops like permaculture with flow arts. We loved how well taken care of we felt and how family-like the festival was. I still remember taking Tom Thumb's Crowd Funding Campaign workshop there, it stuck with me! I am excited to use some of the techniques I learned to fundraise to open a training space in San Diego this year. Another highlight was getting friend avocado tacos from a food truck and vegan ice cream after the festival was over with Casandra and Marvin. 

Jillian & Nathaniel's Wedding

After FlowStorm was Flame Festival in Georgia. I got to bond with Casandra a lot at this one! She picked me up from the airport and we camped together. I ended up sleeping in her car the whole weekend because it was cold! Flame was one of the coolest flow festivals I went to this year. The infrastructure was very Burning Man-like, made it feel like more than just a flow arts festival. I performed my Belly Hoop Fusion routine in the instructor show and taught a couple workshops. That weekend I met McCalla too! We bonded instantly about hooping and ukulele. She said, if you're ever going to New Orleans, look me up. Which I did! In September. Flame Festival had these amazing flame throwing, flame ceiling-ed domes that were especially epic. Perkalator and Kassandra were there, who's workshops I thoroughly enjoyed. 

The Vaudeville Vixens

In April, our good friends Nathaniel and Jillian got married! I was fortunate enough to be a bridesmaid for their beautiful Temecula wedding and it was the first time I was in a bridal party. Bags and I performed our lovey hoop duet and enjoyed the mansion they rented for the weekend. Such a beautiful wedding! We then went to Colorado for The Spin Summit. It was my fourth one! This is where Bags made the crazy epic MultiHoop Madness video with all of the amazing multi-hoopers!! I was surrounded by badass Hoop Juggling women and it was awesome. I helped produce the showcase and enjoyed yet another year at our second home, oh Colorado, I love you!

Marvin Ong's Manipulation Theater

May brought Kinetic Festival in Ohio and Fire Drums in Northern California. Kinetic was one of the more challenging spaces to perform our act in. We were in a barn with rafters overhead that we had to juggle hoops through. It was interesting to say the least. I will never forget the moment in the renegade when Jonathan Alvarez surprised everyone with his unexpected entrance onstage, right after he was referred to by the MC. Whoa, that was a crazy moment! Fire Drums was at a beautiful northern California location. It had a kitschy barn which was probably my favorite part about it. There were butterflies and a really cold creek. The festival itself was freezing at night time too! I am a wimp. We got to perform the in the showcase with Wes Peden in it! Big deal!! The fire circle was HUGE!

Photoshoot with Hoopologie

That month the Vaudeville Vixens had our first photo shoot with Xavier Bailey of Studio X Photography. Wow! That was a wonderful, fun and sexy experience. He's an amazing photographer. You can see some more of the photos here. 

In June, we started the summer gigs at the Lafayette Hotel with Circus Mafia. We had a blast hooping and juggling poolside all summer this year! We also shot a video with the Hoop Unit, centered around Ocean Beach. Watch it here. We had a hoop booth at the OB Street Fair and Chili Cook Off, in which we performed as well. We got to be apart of Marvin Ong's Manipulation Theatre show in Brea and performed to live handpan by Stevan Morris. This was a creative decision made by Marvin that I don't think Bags and I would have chosen for ourselves. But it ended up being one of my all time favorite performance experiences ever. You can watch the video and see the pics here and here. Stevan's music is so dreamy and beautiful to move to. I can still remember looking at Bags, on that big beautiful stage while Stevan played behind us and being in pure blissful heaven. It was the beginning of what I hope is a long friendship and working relationship. I am so grateful to Marvin for that! I also began hooping at the Bahia Hotel that month for the rest of the summer every Thursday to a live band, The Mar Dels. That was a fun regular gig! I love their music and I loved being a gogo dancer/hooper right on the Mission Bay beach. 

Sizzzling Circus Sirens - 5 nights!

In July we went to Colorado for the Colorado Burlesque Festival. I met Midnite Martini for the first time and got to perform right before her at the late night Thursday show. I always love performing at Lannie's! We got to stay with Melinda of Hoopologie and her wonderful family. It was a pure treat to spend time playing with Evan, Mark, Matt, Pam, Danielle, Caterina and Jennifer Alberts! I loved the ping pong games at Evan and Mark's. We went on a gorgeous hike through the Rocky National Forest to Mills Lake for a photoshoot with Melinda, Evan and LOTS of Hoopologie hoops. We visited the mansion that inspired the Shining! 

The Hollywood Burlesque Festival

I also turned 30 in July, right before producing "Sizzzling Circus Sirens" at the Lyceum Theatre for the San Diego International Fringe Festival. Wow. That was an experience. 5 nights almost back to back of shows. I had never done anything like that before! It was intense! Tito Bonito was our host and stayed with us for a whole week. I loved being surrounded by my Burlesque Brother from Another Mother (BBFAM) and my silly husband all week. Lots of giggles! We were very well received at the Fringe with lots of packed houses and a different show every night. We had some great reviews too! We busked pretty much every day and did shows the same night, talk about labor of love! 

After the Fringe show we went to Pennsylvania to teach and perform at Return to Roots. We had taught there in 2013 and loved it so much we wanted to go back! It was on a Christmas tree farm, a really big property of gorgeous land. We slept in hammocks in a forest and relaxed. Another challenging performance experience in the showcase, outside in the dark with bright lights shinning into our eyes while we tried to pass hoops with each other, whoa! Somehow we managed it :)

ABurlyQ!

August brought the Hollywood Burlesque Festival, ABurlyQ and another photo shoot, this time with Scott Saw of Vixen Photography. I competed in the non-local LA performer category in the Hollywood Burlesque Festival and the Vaudeville Vixens performed in the showcase night. It was SO HOT backstage. It was during one of the many heat waves this summer and not AC in the backstage area. Phew! We were melting back there. It was the first time I had competed in a burlesque competition in which I was legitimately disappointed that I didn't place. But it was made up for the next weekend when I did win first place in the Variety Arts category at ABurlyQ with my Dance of the Seven Hoops piece. Emeraude LaStarr and Luna Divine of the Vaudeville Vixens joined me at ABurlyQ in the troupe category. We didn't place in that one but I know we all thoroughly enjoyed the experience. Watch our act here. The community was so warm, welcoming and inclusive. It felt like a big burlesque family love-fest and I truly believe it was due to the two main women who run the festival. An event is always going to take after the energy of it's leader, and these two - Vivian Mirann and Jane Sweeney are truly wonderful, open and sweet women! I was fortunate to teach two hoop workshops in Albuquerque and meet up with my friend Nicole who had a baby since las time I was there. 

Fee Fi Fo BUM in SF at Hubba Hubba

In September the Vaudeville Vixens had a weekend trip to San Francisco and performed in Hubba Hubba Revue's 9th Anniversary show! We did both our Pasties & Parasols number as well as the "Fee Fi Fo BUM" Pirates number. It was a long show! We were the last act in a show that ended up being around 3-4 hours long. I taught a workshop at the Alonzo Lines King Ballet studio again and we went out dancing and drinking in the Mission. I got to eat at my favorite restaurant ever, Gracias Madre and hang out with both Marria of Ninja Hoops and Revolva. It was a fun trip!

I also got to go to New Orleans that month to perform in the New Orleans Burlesque Festival. I was in the House of Blues show, The Queen's Ball. I taught two workshops at Audobon Park near the big beautiful tree with the help of McCalla. I ate vegan begneits at Seed, oh man was that place good! And got to watch the "Bad Girls of Burlesque Show" which I thoroughly enjoyed. Jeez Loueez was by far one of the best MC's I have ever witnessed. I hung out with a lovely bunch of Canadian burlesque performers from the Cheesecake Burlesque Revue. Another highlight  was the performer pool party on Sunday. 

After our Green Card interview

Bags and I joined Fern St Circus for two days of hot summer shows at the Carlsbad ArtSplash then headed up to Santa Cruz for Hoop Camp! The day we left for Hoop Camp we had our long awaited Green Card interview! It was such a stressful thing to lead up to, but it wasn't as bas we thought it was going to be and we passed! Woohoo!! It's a huge victory for us this year, Bags is legal here in the states! Hoop Camp was a blast! We loved teaching, performing and playing with so many epic hoopers. 

After returning home from Hoop Camp, we hosted a fun World Hoop Day celebration at the White Box Theatre with a community showcase, raffle and DJ'ed Hoop Jam. We raised more money for the World Hoop Day than last year and I really enjoyed this change of pace from previous WHD celebrations. There were so many talented hoopers in the show!

10 person corporate juggling gig

Bags and I headed to Marvin Ong's Manipulation retreat in Idlywild while the Vaudeville Vixens went to perform at the Las Vegas Burlesque Festival and represent us there. You can see the video of them performing here. A cool video of MOPs can be seen here. MOPs was epic, as usual. A big beautiful gym for training in all day and night, a gorgeous location and of course the best instructors out there. I loved learning from McKenzey, Gail O'Brien and Melissa Daly. In October we had a very exciting gig through Circus Mafia and Bollotta Entertainment doing a 10 person juggling show for an IAM San Diego event. It was circus themed and quite the production! I was honored to be booked primarily as a juggler :)

Florida Flow Fest

We headed to Florida Flow Fest at the end of October. Casandra is a genius. I loved the model of having a flow festival in a park in the middle of city. The festival is free to attend but you just have to pay to take workshops. So the exposure is truly wonderful. So many people who might not have otherwise known what the flow arts are get to find out about it. I helped produce both nights of showcases and Bags & I performed as well. The shows went really well and I felt appreciated for my addition. We enjoyed teaching, hanging out with Sharna, meeting and staying with Troy and of course spending time with Casandra. 

The Midnight Carnival

November was a big month! We produced the Midnight Carnival, I went to BurlyCon and we had wedding #2 (or number 3 if count the renegade Hoop Camp one). The Midnight Carnival was the biggest, grandest and most exquisite production I have had the pleasure of orchestrating to date. It was a dream of mine to do, and we did it! Midnite Martini headlined and we pretty much sold out the 500 seat theatre. Epic circus acts, flow artists, belly dancers and burlesque performers from all around the country as well as the Hoop Hooligans from New Zealand graced that stage and made me so proud! My students rocked it, troupes killed it and the audience was the best dressed, most loving and most understanding of my seating snafu ever. 

BurlyCon with SD Burly Babes!

Somehow the following weekend I made it to Seattle to have both my body and brain blown away by BurlyCon. I had wanted to go to it for about 5 years but money or scheduling always stopped me. Well this year, even though it was sandwiched between my wedding and a huge production, I went!! And man am I grateful that I did. I learned so much. I think I am still processing all that I learned. I felt like I got to know and bonded even more with some fabulous San Diego performers as well as met and learned from Burlesque stars and legends from around the world. I danced, I stretched, I workshopped, learned, took notes and brainstormed away those 5 days and have over 25 pages of notes to show from it. Whoa! Thank you BurlyCon!

The Second Wedding!

I came home basically to an apartment full of Brits! Bags' best friends Emma, Emily and Sandy all came out to San Diego to be apart of our wedding. Bags' mom and her partner were also in town for a couple weeks. Most of my family were able to make it too! It was a Circus Ukulele Hula Hoop Vegan Potluck wedding, of course! It wouldn't have been possible without the help of everyone who attended, that's for sure. It was a community effort. Everyone pitched in somehow and it ended up being a dream wedding. You can see some fabulous photos of it here. One of my favorite moments from the wedding was singing and playing uke to our own rendition of "I'm Yours" by Jason Mraz in the ceremony with all of the 100 guests! While bubbles floated around :) We then spent Thanksgiving with both mine and Bags' mom which was a real treat.

Ensenada Gig Adventure

December brought some fun holiday gigs. The most memorable was at a convention center outside of Ensenada. The REMOTE convention center was down 30km of washboard dirt road, with crazy colorful Seussian architecture, sculptures, gardens, cacti and the ocean. We performed a 30 min circus show for the local employees of the organization. The org brings leaders from developing countries together to promote development in those regions of the world. I MC'ed our entire show in Spanish! Whoa! Performed in it as well and then came off each act huffing and puffing while trying my best to speak Spanish into a microphone in front of 450 Mexicans. It was intense but I feel really accomplished and of course my desire to work on Spanish has been re-ignited. The kids were the best! I am grateful to Mango and Dango for the referral, to Miriana for the Spanish help, to Bags for pushing me to learn a new routine, MC the show and for being the best adventure/performance partner a girl could ask for. I am excited to welcome more opportunities into my life that bring adventure, attainable challenges and abundance!

Naughty Christmas Burlesque

We also had a fun gig with Circus Mafia doing a holiday themed burlesque circus show for the WomanCare Global Evofem holiday party. That one gave us an excuse to create a fun Christmas-y burlesque routine to "I'm a Little Christmas Cracker" We got our cute costumes from Temptress Fashion. Bags and I have closed out the year working on filming videos of ALL of the skills we have to offer. It has been an intense process! We are working hard, investing in our future and creating gorgeous video content in hopes that clients will have a real idea of what we have to offer. You can see our newest glow hoop video here and my Multi-Hoop Solo routine promo video here. There are lots more on the way! 

Now that I have reviewed 2015 and picked out some of the highlights, I will go through the process of writing down what I am particularly proud of from this past year. I will also hone in on what it is that I want from the year to come. Practicing gratitude for what I already have and pride in what I have accomplished is the best platform for creating attainable goals for 2016! Can't wait to see what we all create!

You can't always get what you want

I can't stop singing the Rolling Stones song. It's something I guess I needed to re-learn. 

I am a firm believer in choosing your own destiny. Making intentional decisions to create a clear path leading you to what you want. Ever since I took on this attitude with conviction it has, for the most part, worked. Set intentions. Be clear about what they are. Write them down so they are present physically in the universe and to create accountability....viola! Watch your dreams come true. Sometimes, the universe has other plans for you. Sometimes you can't get what you want. It's in these moments - the challenging, frustrating, unexpected moments when your true character shines through. How flexible are you? How creative? How can you see the positive side? 

"The only way to make sense out of change is to plunge into it, move with it and join the dance"  - Alan Watts 

Ancient Castle Moat Hooping in Sicily

This quote has been repeated in my head for a couple days now. I was unexpectedly refused entrance into the UK for allegedly "seeking employment". Ironically, Swhoop and the World Burlesque Games, the only two commitments I had for the 6 weeks I was planning to be there were just for fun. I had saved up money working at the San Diego Zoo this summer and was planning to spend that time in Bristol investing in myself. Between volunteering for 3 months in Nicaragua, a knee injury that lasted way too long and working at the Zoo 7 days a week for a 67 day run; I have not been able to invest in myself much this year. Coming home from the UK this week has definitely been one of those harsh you-can't-always-get-what-you-want moments. In the wake of the incident I have to say I've learned my lesson (the hard way) and have found as many positives in the situation as possible. Now I really can focus on myself. I've signed up for a month of unlimited yoga at Corepower, started the Blogilates workouts daily, will be embarking on the Whole30 day food challenge (vegan paleo - no gluten, sugar, alcohol), will actually get to go back to Lyra class at AR and *gasp* take belly dance class from Sabrina Fox again! All of these things are things I've wanted to do this year but for whatever reason couldn't. Well now I can. Thanks UK Border Control!

Vegan Sicilian Food!

Before attempting to go to the UK, Bags and I had the honor of participating in the Ursino Buskers Festival, located in Catania, Sicily. It exceeded my expectations in every way. Sometimes messages come in asking you to go to remote parts of the world and perform your art. This one seemed like it could go either way. When the offer came in, it sounded exciting and perfect because we were already planning to be in Europe the week before and had no commitments at that time. A rarity. We'd never done a street show before though! Our style of performance lends itself to street and it's something we've both wanted to do for awhile but hadn't done it yet. Now we have! It was a great way to ease ourselves into actual street performing since we didn't have to draw a crowd, the festival itself did that for us. 

We had about a week in Catania. We taught two workshops....in their ancient castle! One of our workshops was in the dried (now covered in grass) moat of the castle. Yeah we taught hoop dance in a moat :) Our workshops were well attended and the hoopers were absolutely awesome! Such sweet people who welcomed us with open arms and took amazing care of us. We got to stay in the house of another artist performing at the festival only 2 minutes down the road. Walked through the various markets. Bought delicious fresh veggies. Paraded down the main street with the artists of the festival while a live samba band jammed all the way. We found vegan versions of the local food like "arancini" which is a fried rice ball usually with cheese and/or meat. We found vegan ones! We had granita which is a rich, sweet flavored ice dessert for breakfast, more then once. Pistachio and almond were my favorites! We connected with lovely people whom I'm sure I would be friends with if I lived there. We found our tribe!

Parading down the streets of Catania

Our performances were unforgettable. We did two 15 minute shows and one 5 minute act. The first night we did great but had a couple minor drops. We also didn't know how to talk to the crowd before or after our show since my Italian from living in Rome 8 years ago is gone and the people of Catania don't speak much English. It was kind of awkward putting a hat down without a word. The next night though we absolutely killed it! In our whole 15 minutes, we had no drops! Bags did his 5 club routine flawlessly and our hoops act was seamless. It was one of the happiest I've been from a performance. Complete bliss. With the help of Giulia, I prepared a little something to say in Italian after our show. Giulia was our tour guide, interpreter, fellow hooper and has become our new Italian friend :) We love you Giulia! So I spoke in Italian through a microphone (!!!) to thousands of Italians!!! They loved it! Needless to say our hat was much more full the second night. 

I can't even begin to imagine how much work went into creating the Buskers Festival. There were over 5 spots all within walking distance that had different performance art - circus, theater, live music, fire dancing. There were vendors, activities for children and workshops. The Gammazita bar organized it, which is run by a collective of Sicilians. They have made their area in Catania safer and more culturally rich. They run regular cultural events like film screenings, language courses and circus classes. They informally adopt local kids with hard family lives. These people are amazing. I am so grateful to have met them and experience Catania in this way. Thank you Giorgia, Giulia, Flo, Mic and all the others who put it together! See ALL of the pictures from our Catania trip HERE.

Performing in the Aerial Revolution Showcase - Sept 2011

Attaining the Unattainable: Perfection

- and -

You Just Never Know

This blog was actually meant to talk about my experience working at the Zoo this summer! There is just so much (good and bad) that has happened since then that I had to get it all out. SO rewind three years ago to when I was teaching regularly at Aerial Revolution. I performed in their showcase in September of 2011. It was a fun show. Nothing extremely memorable about it but fun nonetheless. I always enjoyed performing and teaching with the AR crew. They rock! Turns out Rachael and Pete Wray were in the audience that day and really enjoyed my piece. I remember them coming up to me after the show to tell me that it was their favorite act! Fast forward to March of this year, I get a message from Rachael asking if I know any hoopers who could perform at the Zoo this summer. My first thought was...me?! So I asked them if I could do it and they were also looking for another performer for that stage - Bags was the perfect fit! How lucky were we?! We got to do a regular gig in San Diego together. I mean, sheesh!! Exciting stuff! This proves that every show you do, no matter what it's for, how much you're getting paid, IF you're getting paid, matters. Every. Single. One. You never know what it could lead to!

Click here to watch my hoop solo from the Zoo

We changed our summer plans and were sad to not have attended EJC, the Heart & Hoop Dance retreat in the Netherlands and the German Hoop Convention. (Bags got to go!) BUT we had an opportunity of a lifetime! For awhile now I have dreamed of an extended contract gig. Something to bring in a little financial stability and help hone my craft. This was exactly the opportunity I was waiting for. When it all came together it was like the clouds opened up, the sun shined through and the choir started harmonizing in my head. Heavenly! 

I did 4 shows a day for 65 out of the 67 day run. That, plus the parade every other day made for approximately 293 shows. Wowza! That's a lot of shows! It was quite an experience. There were both some serious highs and lows. Looking back at the happy faces Oooo-ing and Awwww-ing at our show and hooping with the kids afterward was amazing. Getting to perform with Bags everyday kept me laughing, smiling and on my toes. I loved getting to know Kasey our hand balancer - she's a talented, smart, opinionated badass. Working with the whole cast and crew actually was unforgettable. Each person was so talented and brought something different to the table. 

Click here to watch Bags' juggling solo from the Zoo

Most of the hard parts for me were what happened psychologically and mentally. You'd think my first gripe would be about physical hardship. Yes exhaustion that was a factor but really what I think I got out of it was how to work through the experience mentally. With that many shows, there was bound to be a certain amount of error. There's just no way around it. We put specific tricks into our routines to help make them stronger. Doing something that many times will make you better at it right? Well it wasn't always that straight forward. There is no science to it, turns out. Even if you do something 300 times, you can still struggle with it on the 301st. I expected consistency, had an extremely high expectation for myself and strove to attain perfection. That led to disappointment sometimes and then probably mentally hindered me for the next show (or even during the show). It was a cyclical thing. Somehow I broke down enough to break through the cycle and come out on the other end! 

Click here to see our duet

I found myself actually daydreaming while performing! When you do something that many times, you start to think about what you're going to cook for dinner, what show you're going to watch when you get home, etc. I had to snap myself out of that and remind myself to Be Here Now. Completely in the moment. Also I found fun ways to concentrate, or actually take my mind off of the hard tricks (because sometimes when you concentrate too much it messes you up - sometimes you just have to let your body do it). Whenever we got to a certain section that required extreme concentration, I would think about happy positive words that weren't loaded with anything performance related. So thinking the word "perfect" or "seamless" didn't work because it was too much pressure. Instead I would think "cupcake" "sprinkles" "rainbow sherbet" :) It worked!

Those ups and downs, those break-downs and break-throughs; that process IS perfection. The experience in itself and what I learned from it is just...perfect. 

All in all, regardless of how hard it was at times, how tired, sore, hot, sweaty and cranky I got, I am still immensely grateful for the experience. Remember that dropless show I talked about earlier in Sicily Bags and I had? I truly believe that was possible because of all the practice we got in this summer. With a couple weeks space from the gig, doing our show again felt more solid and comfortable then it ever has and that is largely due to our work at the Zoo. I feel SO much more confident juggling and multi-hooping, two things I want to be solid at. So thank you. Thank you Pete & Rachael Wray most of all for trusting us to do our best this summer and taking us on board as part of the team. Big thanks to the entire cast of awesomeness, it was a pleasure to meet you and get to know you. I hope we all get to do it again sometime :)